Nobody likes being cheated, on so once your wife finds out you are engaging on illicit affairs with another woman or a man, her initial reaction would be to get upset with you.However, despite your efforts of keeping your marital affairs a secret, they will eventually be discovered by close friends, your family, and your wife – especially if the cheating has been going on for a very long time already.
A lot of husbands who get caught having a bit on the side tend to panic, which leads to more trouble for them and their mistresses, too. Once your wife finds out what you have been doing behind her back, here are some ways on how to deal with it to avoid further trouble.
Decide what to do with your marriage
A married man may look for illicit encounters because he feels unloved or unwanted by his wife. If you are cheating to fill that feeling of emptiness and it gets discovered, consider what to do with your marriage: Should you stay or should you leave? Realise what drove you into cheating on your wife. If it seemed like your relationship with her had been over ever since you started cheating on her, it may be time to leave the empty marriage. Still, consider separating or parting tastefully to avoid inflicting further burden on the situation.
Dealing with the guilt
It is natural for a wife to feel remorseful toward the husband upon discovering his infidelity. Any husband who ever felt love for his wife could easily feel guilty that he wronged her, but in your case, learn to deal with your feelings of guilt and it pass. This should give you and your wife ample time to reflect on whether your marriage is still worth saving or not. This is also a good time for you to reflect on what you have done. This is the right time to be sensitive to your wife but you have to be patient because of her vulnerable motional state.
Instead of completely walking out on her and leaving her hanging on why you did it, learn to communicate to your wife on what drove you to cheat on her. Remember that by talking, you are actually making an effort to save the marriage and make it work out again. Learn how she is feeling and tell her how you really feel. Not being able to communicate makes you seem insensitive anyway.
If you are currently facing the reality of being caught, you may think that it is over between you and your wife. However, there are still a lot of couples willing to work things out. All you need is compromise, and you may actually save your marriage.